With my little guy, we took the wise advice of a friend and practiced a little selfcontrol game. I was getting frustrated cause he would thrash his body all over in in appropriate times like when I was putting his clothes on or picking him up to put him in the crib. He was not upset or crying he was just being silly. So over a few days we sat together (he and I) in front of a mirror and play this game. I said, "Today we are going to learn what silly looks like. Show me a silly face. Now show me silly hands, show me a silly body." Then we both would do funny and silly movements. Then I said,"Now show me what self-control looks like. Then I modeled for him what 'self-control' would look like. I stood STILL with hands folded. When he imitated selfcontrol with folded hands, I rewarded him with a high five! Great Job showing me what self-control looks like! We continued PRACTICING! What does silly look like? What does self-control look like! It became a fun game. Then I briefly explained that there are fun and silly times when we are at school and church and in the car and at home and the store.... And there are times when we need to have self- control too! Today, we are going to practice these things at school, home......etc.
Then later when we were about our day, in the car, taking a bath...etc, I would remind him of our game and what a great job he did and to do a great job when it is time to have self control and have a fun time when it is time to be silly. Not a long speech just a quick reminder. (I see this as helping him think correctly and with good and positive information). When I saw him become unglued and out of control - in a calm and playful way - I still pull out the game.
The funny thing is... he loves the game. He gets to be silly and see mom being silly and it is special bonding time with mom too! The most important thing is that he is learn how to contain his impulses and be pleasant to be around and for others to want to be around him.
1 comment:
I like that idea. I'm gonna try it with my kids (5 andn 2) tomorrow. :)
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